Story VII- Final piece

Every relationship she had been in, she thought it would last. Hoped and prayed. Now that He was willing to offer it, she turned it down and ran away before she felt weak. Was she afraid of "forever and ever afters"? All her life, she has been wanting to settle down, with that one someone who she could share her her everyday secrets, laugh and even cry and be herself. Now that she was here, in Kerala on a vacation alone for the first time, she didn't feel alone. Even in her apartment in Banjara, she lived alone, yet going to an empty always reminded her of her loneliness, that loneliness now felt like freedom.

Nikki looked around the restaurant and saw couples, families, friends and for the first time, she was not envious. She smiled. A real smile, as she drank her coffee. She had been searching for a missing piece to complete herself, not realizing she was born a complete picture, true to itself.

Story VI

Now that Nikki was in Kerala, she should have been fine right? New place, New people to meet. Yet this mind and heart was still the same. She had left it behind in Hyderabad... the urge to call him, was so strong. She only wanted to hear his again. To tell her that it would be all right and she should just trust him. She still had a choice. Sigh! The choice!

It was a choice that she made 4 years ago...to be a second fiddle, to shatter some child's dream, to wreck a marriage and live with that guilt. That guilt tasted sweet, too sweet until her stomach began to cry 'no more'.

**********

He met her the same place they met the first time to tell her that he had made a decision. He wanted her. He was willing to walk out of 15 years of marriage for her sake. He was willing to leave behind his son to be with her. He was willing to offer her all that she ever dreamed off and even more. A marriage and a life! And yet she walked out on him, on them and their future.

***********

Now that Nikki thought of it, agreeing to be someone's mistress seeemed easier than to be someone's wife. Strange!

Story V

Love.. that seemed today like an empty word. As she sat, watching people from the window that oversaw the neighbourhood park, she saw the empty swing, wet in rain, drenched completely, alone..just like her..She knew she could get past this, she had seen worse in life and yet right now, her heart was shattered into so many tiny pieces that it was almost impossible to count.

Time, they say is a great healer. May be a change of place would help. Nikki went over to the telephone directory, and searched for travel agents and dialled the first number she saw.-040-543217 . It belonged to some Vishal Travel Agents . It had been a long time since she had taken a break, with weekends being spent with him, she never really had a chance for a holiday, not since 4 years. The lady over the was briefing her about different plans that was available for the weekend; Hampi, Mangalore, Goa, Chennai,... She loved beaches but she knew people in Goa. That wouldn't do. She really wasn't into architecture stuff, so that rules out Hampi, Mangalore didn't sound interesting enough and Chennai was crowded. She screwed her lips when she saw her choices.

" Madam, would you be interested in Kerala? Weekend might be too short a trip though."

Kerala... she knew no one there nor has she ever been there. " That will be perfect. Could you please book the ticket for me? "

StoryIV

Nikki never thought she would be one of those clingy types. She was brought up to be a strong independent woman; her job and her flat in Banjara Hills; (one of the costliest areas in Hyderabad, mind you!)should be proof enough. Not that she minded him going back to his wife on weekdays, weekends were always for her. That was the arrangement. Yet the times she didn't get to see him, times he didn't answer her phone or reply to her messages, she felt alone and lost.

*******

"What is your biggest fear?" he had asked her on the first meeting.
" Failure," she replied.
" No ," he pressed again,"I asked the biggest fear?"
" That is my biggest fear." (It was partly true. I mean, I do sometimes fear what would happen to me if i lost my job and stuff right?)
" No, You are lying."
"Are you trying to psychoanalyse me , mister?"
" May be,I am" and he smiles. (Oh God! The Guy has a killer smile.No!No!. You can't be falling for a smile!)
She laughed. The truth was she just couldn't admit to her fear yet. People did see her as a confidant, modern woman, but like all , she was as scared as anyone. Afraid of making mistakes, afraid of turning out to be big failure, afraid that people around do not like her, afraid that one day if she dies, there would be no one to cry for her. But that was not what scared her the most, no matter how much she tried to change it, it just remained deep within her heart.

However, things had changed after she had met him. She had learned to take a chance, a chance in love and allowed herself to get hurt,... the betrayal and distrust and lies and some more lies.... And finally learnt that although her fears were well grounded, she could sometimes take a chance....

StoryIII

The first look,the first talk, the first touch, the first kiss are always special. So was this first meeting. Nikki knew instinctively she would never forget that day. How could she end up talking somuch and sharing so much to a total random stranger? He knew exactly what to tell her and one of those rare people who knew when to talk and when to listen. Most people end up opening their mouthtraps with either their advise or "It happened to me too and you know what I did?" (Who cares what you did? Seriously, If I am in some shit, do I care you went through it as well. It is my turn to grumble, don't bring in your miseries as well)

He wasn't like all other men she had met. Initially she thought it was just that novelty that made him so special, you know, new boyfriend is always special. But then what they had shared was definitely special ( at least to her) and something amazing which she hadn't felt with any one before. He made her feel secured, something that she hadn't felt since she was 13.

He was right for and all wrong for her too. (How can anybody be that way!)That is what made him so special. She decided to take a chance when she said 'yes' even after knowing that he was married!

StoryII

People said they weren't right for each other. Friends warned her, he wasn't her type. But she was in love, madly in love. That is the problem with love. Not only is it blind, but deaf and dumb too. You stop using your faculties of mind, it stops working and heart takes over completely. Thats what happened to her when she met him for the first time. She never believed in love at 1st sight, yet that day..
It was 24th may, 2007 they met at a coffee house. She had a bad day that day and the friend who was supposed to meet her in the coffee house, stood her up. It was awkward to sit alone in a coffee house and sip coffee alone, " height of loneliness," she thought. Thats true, she was lonely. Well, she did have friends. making friends was always easy for her. But none of them knew her. There was Megs a.k.a Meghna Mathur, her roomie whom she could always rely on, there was Siddharth, a cute guy in office who has now come to be her new friend whom she shared stuff with ( coz Megs now has a boyfriend) and who she had a teeny weeny crush on. She was lost in her thoughts, that's when she caught him staring at her through his book and to her surprise, he walked up to her and sat right across her on the table...

StoryI

"And I thought, I knew him. I thought I knew him inside out. How do you know, know a person? You think you know, and then bam! Life surprises you, mocks at you, at your stupidity, at your knowings, "Nikki kept thinking this as she kept walking in the rain. She normally loved to walk in the rain, but then today was not a normal day. One of those days, where you think life has cheated on you.

She thought of many things as she walked. She forgot that she normally took a bus home. She kept walking, thinking of what went wrong, where she went wrong. You cant rewind your life and undo things. If only she could do it, this one time... just this one time.

to be continued.....

P.s. all the characters are imaginary and coincidences, if any, is no fault of the author