The dance, dancer and the dancing....

To dance is a joy for a person who loves attention and cant stand still for long, I think this is just great :).. I was forced to learn Bharathnatyam by my mum, i didnt like it initially..preferred bollywood numbers and we used to have classes on saturday evening, 5 pm and that was the time when movie was telecasted on doordarshan. I was reluctant to miss the movie for dance, threw such great tantrums.. i seriously think if i was born in 50's I would have joined Bollywood.. :) nautanki 1st class :)

It was not until I finished my junior level dance that I began to love what I was doing.. But I would still enjoy Bollywood numbers better. Years and years of training in dance, being at teachers place for exams, dussera programmes, vimshati was so much fun. She is my 2nd mother, my dance teacher, Kamala Bhat. I am so glad my mum chose her, she is sooo amazing and her expressions are just marvelous. I remember her teaching me, kadegolu tarenna chinnave. It a devaraname full of abhinaya or expression and the scene is such that Krishna steals away the stick used to churn the curd and yashoda asking him to return it to her. She actually made a kid run around us so that we get our expressions right.. Morning 7.30 AM classes would begin during exams, would go up till 11 in the night.. Wejust danced during the holidays..:)

During the dance performances I would always search for something, I mean expression wise was fine but inside I wouldnt feel that great. Then during vidwat exam, the danc ethat happened, I was shocked with the performance...that was when I became the dance.. To be one and experience that unity..that is what we all crave for after all.. I remember feeling that when I used to dance to Bollywood numbers..When the audience, stage, dance, song music all fuse into me..nothing remains but the dance... Usually I dont know what to do after feeling the unity..I either cry or get the kick from the performance and am supremely high :).. Yesterday Vivekanna told me, going beyong the rasas and just being with it, with the oneness..that is I should do.. You know Tennyson now seems to make a lot of sense to me now:)

That God, which ever lives and loves,
One God, one law, one element,
And one far-off divine event,
To which the whole creation moves.