Methinks :)

Something to ponder on

2012-02-06T23:52:00.000-08:00

Came across this article again via forward. I am not politically that aware yet thought I should share this here.

________________________________________________________

THE STATESMAN

Special Article

O1 February 2012

President and the Army
Must Intervene And Save The Institution

By MG Devasahayam

THE President made a profound statement while addressing the nation on the eve of the 63rd Republic Day: “While bringing about reforms and improving institutions, we have to be cautious that while shaking the tree to remove the bad fruit, we do not bring down the tree itself.” But, under her nose an institution called the Indian Army is being rudely shaken and being brought down by the very government she is presiding over. Despite being the Supreme Commander of India’s armed forces she has not even lifted a small finger to stop that.

Republic Day is an occasion of joy and celebration because on that day in 1950, “We, the People of India, gave ourselves a Sovereign, Socialist, Secular, Democratic Republic anchored on Justice, social, economic and political; Liberty of thought, expression, belief, faith and worship; Equality of status and of opportunity and to promote among them all Fraternity assuring the dignity of the individual and the unity and integrity of the Nation”.

Sixty-two years have passed and every year we go through the ritual of celebrations and parades with the armed forces in general and Army in particular in the vanguard. It is the members of these forces who have defended and protected our democracy through their valour, sacrifice and total sense of patriotism, bereft of any political ambitions as in our neighbouring countries. It is largely because of them that India stands tall as a sovereign Republic.

Among the armed forces, the Army is the largest and the most visible face. The chief of that force has a special status in the nation’s affairs, irrespective of his place in the order of precedence. The present government at the Centre has lost the faith of a vast majority of the people because of colossal failures almost on all fronts, except mortgaging the nation’s assets and resources to MNCs. Now the Chief of the Army Staff himself has lost faith in this government and has knocked the doors of the Supreme Court seeking justice.

Instead of resolving the matter amicably by rendering substantial justice to the General, worthies of the kleptocratic state have the cheek to display indulgence. They claim that even if the apex court order goes against the Army chief, the government will not summarily sack him. What morbid magnificence after treating General VK Singh in the shabbiest manner possible!

The controversy is supposed to have arisen due to different sets of records maintained on the General’s Date of Birth (DoB) in the Adjutant General (AG) and Military Secretary (MS) branches of the Army headquarters. There are facts in the public domain suggesting availability of several records and documents in the AG Branch ~ school register, matriculation certificate, father’s record of service in the Rajput Regiment, form No. IAFZ-2041 filled up in IMA ~ establishing the General’s DoB as 10 May 1951.

The MS Branch is stated to have an application form for the written entrance exam to the National Defence Academy signed by a 14/15-year-old boy and some assorted papers mentioning Singh’s DoB as 10 May 1950. The two branches have not reconciled the documents for over four decades.
The Attorney General and the MoD are sticking to the MS Branch records in determining the General’s DoB as 10 May 1950 because it is this branch which is responsible for the promotion and posting of senior army officers. This is the spin that is going around.

But a confidential communication dated 01 Jul 2011 (A/4501/01/GEN/MS(1)) from Lt.-Gen. GM Nair, Military Secretary to Defence Secretary, tells a totally different tale. On four occasions:
-No: 2 Selection Board, Sept 1996 ~ Fresh case 1970 batch for promotion to the acting rank of Brigadier;
-No: 1 Selection Board, 25 Oct 2001 ~ Fresh case 1970 batch for promotion to the acting rank of Maj. Gen;
-No: 1 Selection Board, 18/19 Sept 2003 ~ Special Review (Fresh) Case 1970 Batch for promotion to the acting rank of Maj. Gen; and
-Special Selection Board, 30 Sept 2005 ~ Fresh case 1970 Batch for promotion to the acting rank of Lt. Gen.
The date of birth of the General Officer (VK Singh) put up by the MS Branch and considered by the Selection Boards was 10 May 1951.

This means that the MS Branch had accepted, adopted and documented 10 May 1951 as the DoB for empanelling Gen. Singh for promotion and posting as Brigadier, Maj.-Gen. and Lt.-Gen. in 1996, 2001, 2003 and 2005 respectively. Where then was the dispute and the occasion for the former Amy Chiefs to talk to VK Singh in 2008 and 2009 and make him ‘accept’ 10 May 1950 as his DoB? On what grounds was the ‘statutory complaint’ of the Army Chief rejected, reportedly without the knowledge of the Prime Minister, forcing the General to go to the Supreme Court? The government owes an explanation to the people.

Looking at the state of the Republic one tends to lament and despair in the manner of Marcellus in Hamlet, having just seen the ghost of Hamlet’s father, the late king of Denmark: “Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.”

Considering the way things are being handled even by an otherwise god-fearing man like AK Antony, there seem to be ghosts looming in New Delhi. One is the MNC lobby that is incensed with General Singh’s principled opposition to the deployment of the Army to decimate the tribal population of Dandakaranya forests to hand it over to mining interests. The General had said: “We cannot do this on our own people. Naxalism is not a secessionist movement.’’
Former Admiral Vishnu Bhagwat saw another, even mightier ghost, when he said: “Former Chief Justice of India JS Verma has said Singh had brought in probity and honesty. He is being moved out just when large arms deals are going to be signed. This means that the arms lobby and a few people who are going to be affected are behind this.”

To this could be added the ‘victims’ of the tough stand taken by General Singh on corruption, particularly former Generals involved in the Sukna land scam and Adarsh Housing Society scandal.

This is probably why a specious and non-existent theory of ‘line of succession’ was dug out and touted about for rejecting the army chief’s statutory complaint. The ‘line of succession’ is a concept which is anti-democratic and related to royalty and monarchy. Why then is the Attorney General repeating this ad nauseam? Obviously in support of the MoD’s sinister agenda.

VK Singh belongs to a family that boasts a martial tradition. He hails from Bapora village in Haryana’s Bhiwani district, a district that I had the privilege of raising and building up as its first Commissioner when it was established in December 1972. This village, hardly a couple of miles from Bhiwani, had a large number of serving soldiers and ex-servicemen. Being an ex-soldier myself, I had closely interacted with the simple folk of this village.

Men of General Singh’s ilk serve and die by the Army’s standards of integrity and honesty. When men like him and the Army he commands are impaled, it is the people who bleed. Pray, does not the President, who swears by institutions, have a duty to effectively intervene and save this institution from further damage? The nation awaits an answer.

The writer is a retired IAS officer

How cow slaughter became legal in India?

2012-01-25T03:08:00.000-08:00

I got this as a forward by Sam John , a very good friend of mine. So you see cows being sacred is not entirely a religious issue. There is something more to it than what we choose to see. So here it is:

Those were the times when India was at the peak of Mughal Rule. The rulers
of a large part of India were muslims and guess what, they had banned Cow
Slaughter in that Mughal Empire. Nobody dared to kill cows and eat beef in
that Muslim Empire.
The Mughal Empire and Cow

Babur, who invaded India all the way from Kabul and established the Mughal
Empire in India, despite being an orthodox Muslim had banned Cow Slaughter
in his empire. All successive Mughal Emperors – Humayun, Akbar, Shah Jahan,
Jehangir, Aurangazeb, and then even Ahmad Shah had banned Cow Slaughter in
their kingdoms. Hyder Ali and Tippu Sultan who ruled the Mysore State in
the present day Karnataka had made cow slaughter and beef eating a
punishable offence and the crime would be punished by cutting off the hands
of the person who committed the crime!

Today in India we have over 36000 slaughterhouses! How did this massive
turn around take place?
Cow and The Hindu Civilization

To understand that first we need to get back to the importance of cow in
the ancient Hindu civilization of India. Cows are the most sacred animals
to the Hindus and this is not without any reason. In fact the very word Cow
in English is derived from the Sanskrit word*Gau*for Cow
Hindus believe that all Gods and Goddesses live inside a Cow

One of the most important reasons is that cows have been the backbones of
Indian families and the Indian agricultural system ever since the dawn of
this ancient Hindu civilization. Apart from the extensively used Cow’s milk
which the ancient Indians used to collect only after the calf has had its
share, the most important use of Cows was in Agriculture. Without Cow the
Indian agriculture in those days was as good as gone, and this was one of
the prime reasons why Hindus being nature worshippers also worshipped Cow.

Cows had their own shelters called Gaushalas (large places where the cows
lived) which were many a times larger than the homes where people lived.
There used to be people exclusively to look after the well being of the
cows here and many a times they used to be the cow owners themselves who
used to clean the Gaushalas everyday, feed the cows, take care of their
health and so on . Every single festival of harvest had cow worship, house
warming ceremonies had the ritual of taking the cow inside the house first
and then pray to it to make the house prosper and flood with food grains,
milk and butter.

Cows being fed at a Gaushala

Note that those were the days when food was grown in a healthy natural
process. There was no industrial revolution, no artificial fertilizers, no
chemical pesticides and insecticides. The entire Indian agriculture was
based on the nature’s best fertilizer – Cow dung, and one of the nature’s
best pesticide – Cow’s urine (along with the neem based solutions) were
used extensively in the agriculture. Buttermilk again which is a derivative
of Cow’s milk was used as an effective fungicide and weedicide.

And not without any reason, the Indian agriculture in those days was
extremely productive thanks to the cow products. Farmers were happy, crops
came on time, yield was high, prices were low for food crops, kingdoms even
used to export their agricultural output, granaries were always filled,
milk was abundantly available and so were its derivatives like Butter, Ghee
etc which formed an important part of the Indian diet. Every religious
institution, big farms, farmers, diary owners all had thousands of cows –
the cows which had made the Indian economy rich and healthy.

Even today in African deserts were growing food is difficult and whatever
grows must give a rich yield for people to have adequate food, fermented
cow’s urine is used as a natural pesticide. Compare this with farmers today
who spend thousands and thousands of rupees on artificial fertilizers and
chemical pesticides, which not only make the food unhealthy, but also make
the soil unproductive over time.

Cow slaughter and slaughterhouses are banned even today in Nepal. In India,
very few are aware of the fact that Article 48 of the Indian Constitution
(Directive Principles of State Policy) says clearly that the government
must protect the cow, its progeny and other cattle used in agriculture, not
just because the cows are sacred to Hindus but because Cows have been the
backbone of Agriculture and milk production in this country ever since the
dawn of civilization. To millions of poor families in India, even today
Cow’s milk is the only source of nutrient to their kids and babies.

In India states like Jammu & Kashmir, Uttar Pradesh, Gujarat, Chattisgarh,
Madhya Pradesh, Karnataka etc have already banned Cow slaughter (Karnataka
being a very recent addition). Cuba banned cow slaughter after its people
virtually ate up all the cattle leading to a scarcity of diary products.
Even Iran has banned Cow slaughter and note that it was at the request of a
non-muslim –Seth Merwanji Framji Panday that Iran – a muslim dominated
nation banned cow slaughter. <http://www.fravahr.org/spip.php?article61> Now
compare this with India today where our politicians are prepared to sell
anything in return for votes.
British Rule and Slaughterhouses

Both Mahathma Gandhi and Pandit Nehru had declared before Independence that
they would ban Cow slaughter in India after Independence. Obviously they
didnt impose it. Why? Thanks to Robert Clive who had converted the Indian
muslims (who never ate beef till the end of Mughal era) into believing that
beef eating was their religious right. Cow slaughter had become a vote bank
issue. How? Read below.

Robert Clive – the so called Founder of the British Empire in India who was
twice the Governor of Bengal too – on entering India was astonished and
amazed to see the success of the agricultural system here. He went on
researching the reasons for the success of the Indian agriculture and
discovered the root – The Holy Indian Cow. The entire hindu life style
revolved around this animal, not just religiously, but socially. Cow was an
integral part of a Hindu family as was any other human member in the
family. He even found that in many places the total number of cattle was
more than the number of humans living there.

OK, so he decided, to break the backbone of agriculture in India – the holy
cows have to be targeted. And thus was opened the first slaughterhouse of
cows in India in 1760 by Robert Clive at Kolkata. It had a capacity to kill
30,000 cows per day. And anyone can guess within a year’s time how many
cows would have been killed. And within a century India had very little
cattle left to sustain its agricultural needs. And Britain as an
alternative started offering artificial manure, and in this manner urea,
phosphate etc started getting imported from England. Indian agriculture had
started becoming dependent on west invented artificial products and was
forced to give up home grown natural practices.

Guess what, till 1760 most of India had banned not only cow slaughter, but
also prostitution and drinking wine was banned as well. Robert Clive made
all three legal and removed the ban.

Now the British had hit two birds with a single stone by this move. The
first was to break the backbone of the Indian agriculture ie making cattle
not available for agriculture. And the second?

Well, obviously Hindus did not work as butchers at the slaughter houses
opened by the British. And of course the British were well known for their
divide and rule policies which they practiced throughout their colonial
kingdoms then. So what did they do? Well, they hired muslims as butchers
and this was done in almost every slaughterhouse they opened. And this
slowly pushed the muslims into believing that beef eating was their
religious right.

What the Mughal empire had banned had been turned into a practice by the
British empire. What Babur and Akbar termed as a crime was converted into a
norm by Robert Clive. And today the soil of India is filled with artificial
fertilizers and pesticides while the holy Cow cries in the slaughterhouses.
While there were over 70 breeds of cows in the country at the time of
independence, today we have only 33 and even among them many breeds are
facing extinction.

Guess what happened to the man who started all this? Robert Clive became a
opium addict and later committed suicide by stabbing himself with a pen
knife after being unable to withstand the pain caused by the illness that
had resulted from opium addiction.

If you like to read more You can check out:
Origin And History Of Cow Slaughter And Beef Eating In
India<http://www.hitxp.com/articles/history/origin-cattle-holy-cow-slaughterhouse-beef-conspiracy-india/>
PUBLISHED JUN 28, 2010, UNDER: HISTORY<http://www.hitxp.com/articles/history/>

http://www.hitxp.com/articles/culture/sanskrit-greek-english-latin-roman-words-derived-pie-proto-indo-european-language/

Why Should You Vote? | The March – Against Terrorism, Against Corruption

2012-01-05T10:18:00.000-08:00

Why Should You Vote? | The March – Against Terrorism, Against Corruption

Tale of words IV

2012-01-03T01:10:00.000-08:00

Read Tale of words I and Tale of words II and Tale of words III

If only B knew the language of Silence, the language of the Yaksha, the language of the Nature....To catch the gap between the words, to feel the life in between the breath, to sense the touch without the actual touching and to feel the presence in the absence is what makes life worthwhile..That is what the tale of words is all about.. not to breath meaning into the words but to know the space within the letters and to know the words... the language of the Yaksha. But then could A say it all to B? He would have to betray the language that he just learnt then. All A said to B was , "Listen to the whispers of the infinity .." and smiled..

Together A and B walked back...

2012-01-01T10:42:00.000-08:00

It is time to make some resolutions again.. Meanwhile what did I do in 2011 and what it taught me....
1. Vini wedding :
That is how the year started and What a start!! ( Happpy Wedding Anniversary Vini btw:) and what I learnt?? Letting go is easier than I thought :)

2. Manavathe courses and organisation:
I learnt to delegate work, interact with people over phone and get things done in time. Never in my dreams I thought I could do all that, that too while I was teaching full time in a college with super hectic routine :) Help will come to you, but you need to ask and stretch your hands first.

3. My lovely blog saw many stories, poems and posts making me realise that I am actually creative:) heartbreaks can be utilised to go inward and write better ..

4. Mathemagic by Bawa:
It was like a dream come true:) The session after as well. I learnt that work can happen when all are involved and making all of them involved is a skill that we need to learn :) teamwork sounds good, hard to practise which is why we have Sohum and Sowhat:)

5. I am ACTUALLY SUPER FORTUNATE!!! I can even say I am luckier than Girin too :) and that I realised very slowly but I am glad I realised that this year

6. Joined Ballroom dance class: If you love something, you need to go for it!!! Grab the opportunity while you can..and I am sooooo glad that I did..dancing brought back the balance that I needed in life (since I was considering VRS from the path of spirituality :))

7. I feel I am now more closer to family ( I do not know if they feel the same ..hahhahaha)

8. As a lecturer I have evolved learnt the ropes of my trade and is still learning :) ELTAI conference in VIT evoked the research spirit in me but then laziness took over

9. After so much cribbing, now that my single days are almost over. I am more than ever grateful that I got to be single for sooo long.

Everything is perfect the way it.. Kuch karna nahin hai, bus dekhna hai

Connecting the dots

2011-12-08T09:43:00.001-08:00

I understand what Steve Jobs said when he said his speech on 'connecting the dots' . For a year I wondered what was I doing teaching English in an Engineering College. I do love my students, but my job felt meaningless (considering how the Engineering students in India feel they need know English, no matter how pathetic their language is) Of course when the foreign students came along, it was a blessing and an honour to teach them and realise the joys of this profession and how rewarding it can be. I did miss teaching literature in a degree college, I felt my talents were better suited for a school or a degree college NOT professional one.

That is when I got to talk to this girl in yes plus, who I had the fortune of meeting:) and it was these year in Engineering College that made me realise Engineering and Arts are not at the logger heads. It was my year in this college that I worked which helped me talk to her the words that she needed at that time:) What more to say, She got the nudge that was needed. ( nudge was all that she required, not even a push) :)

So what I thought was meaningless somehow made sense. If my one year of work helped me realise what she needed to hear which in turn changed her life.. then I must say, the Universe is super intelligent! It is my stupidity that I doubt the Intelligence and its ways:):) and Universe has a very nice way of making me realise it :):)

Dedicated to the one who always has a way with me; for whose presence in my life I amsuper duper forever grateful for and to the Universe for bestowing me with THAT presence

Change

2011-11-23T11:08:00.001-08:00

Seasons change;

Like the rest of us.

Some notice,

Some pretend to see

Some ignore.

Some are just far away.

Seasons change;

Like the rest of us.

Always they hope,

Never they do,

Fools don't realise,

They both don't exist

in the absolute.

Absolute is relative here

coz one day fool changes too.

Tale of words III

2011-10-19T10:48:00.000-07:00

Read Tale of words I and Tale of words II

A and B needed to know the secret behind words. They went to the hills and began to search for that one person who knew. People said he was very old. No one knew when he was born. They all remember him staying at the top of the hill in a small hut and looking at the valleys below. Nobody knew his name, we can call him Yaksha. Yakshas know all the secrets and so did he.

A and B reached the place of Yaksha and saw him waiting for them as if he knew they would come to him. He did not say a word and merely looked. They sat in front of him not knowing what to say. For a moment they forgot the purpose of their journey. Having travelled all over they just relaxed looking at the valleys below along with Yaksha.

They kept staring for along time. Perhaps this was some sort of prayer and they sat with him. They kept thinking about their friends, their village, their wives. They thought why they had come there. They thought about the people in the valley. They thought about Yaksha and what he did for a living

It began to grow dark yet not a word was uttered among them. A and B had rested well and figured it was time to talk to Yaksha. But he kept looking down at the valley. A and B decided they were hungry and cooked few vegetables and rice. They gave some of it to Yaksha.

After food Yaksha went in and got few blankets and laid them out on the ground and lay staring at sky. "More staring!!!" thought B and looked at A. A however lay next to Yaksha and stared at the sky which was now light with stars. "If I have come all this way, I might as well do this" thought A.

B also decided to lay down as he had no where else to be. He couldn't lay there doing nothing. He started counting stars and went up till 16,740 and then decided to stop. It made no sense. A and Yaksha continued to stare at the sky in silence. B decided he would look at the stars and see what kind of animals he could find in the sky. He saw camel head, pig snout, a whole elephant, a bear and he could even see his grandma's face.

A lay for long time staring ta the stars wondering if they would speak to him. Wind was blowing gently across his face and soon it began to whisper softly in to his hear. At first he couldn't hear it clearly but soon he could hear them sing. The song telling him about the words.. it was song of the words. He fell asleep with sweet melody singing into his ears.

Next day morning A woke up early and made a cup of tea for the 3 of them. B wanted to go back to the town as he felt the whole journey was a waste of time and Yaksha knew nothing.

A decided to take leave of Yaksha and went up to him. He kissed his feet and looked into his eyes. A could not thank him and he knew there was no point thanking. His tears washed the feet of Yaksha. Yaksha smiled at him knowing that he had arrived and watched him go back along with B.

B watched the whole scene and thought something was up with A

2011-10-12T11:15:00.000-07:00

To be brain dead... is sometimes a joy:)

Just another tale

2011-09-09T10:29:00.000-07:00

It was 11.30 in the morning and all her household chores were done. Manu was at the tour and children would come back from school only in the evening. The house felt strangely empty. When her Mother-in- Law used to be around, she would have endless chores of cleaning the Puja room twice a day, arranging for the Puja, making garlands, cleaning the lamps and preparing prasadam while her mother-in- law watched her like a hawk to see if she did it all right.

It must be an Iyer family tradition or the law of nature, but it is a known fact that mothers in law and daughters in law can never be friends. She did not expect a friendly Mother-in- Law, her mother had taught her well about that if not anything else. Her Mother- in- Law was not exactly a vile woman, but she was not an angel either. Be it in the kitchen about the true tamil sambar taste, or how sweet adirasam was supposed to be; Or her wardrobe on the colour of her sarees , and the length of her blouse sleeves; the woman had problem with everything she did And she always complied to her wishes only because Manu wanted her to. But now things had changed.

She now had the floors of the kitchen redone with vinyl flooring. The one that she always wanted and painted the kitchen in beige colour instead of yellow. Kitchen now looked sleek and modern and grinding stone now was replaced by the machine which saved her a lot of time. That was one thing her Mother- In- Law never let her buy. She believed that dosa batter was better if it was grinded in the stone with hand and made her grind it for hours together especially when her daughter and Manu's sister came down from US. While the family listened to her sister in law' stories with accent, she sat in the kitchen grinding.

Things were different now, she had things her way. Victory some how doesn't taste as sweet as she imagined it would. There was no regretting the decision she had made. Manu supported her this time. It was for everybody's good, thinking this she went to her cupboard and decided to clean it. Her Mother In- Law insisted on keeping the house spic and span and made sure she kept it that way. Guess, although her mother- in- law was gone, she has managed to stay on.

While cleaning the cupboard, something fell down. She looked at the beautiful brown hand embroidery patterns on the plain white cloth. It was a design that she seen on a cushion at the backseat of her friend's car years ago. She loved the design so much that she had copied it on the tissue paper and had to reproduce it on an old white salwar. It was an Egyptian Pharoah with intricate golden jewelery. She started it at the time she was pregnant with her Aditi, her first daughter. She couldn't finish the design and it was left lying in the cupboard for years until now.

People always asked her why not try the sewing machine that gave several options and made patterned stitches of several kinds and all you had to do was choose the type and let the machine do the rest. But she loved her Nani's method of hand stiching. Her Mausi wanted her to learn knitting. A true girl from Shimla must know knitting was what her mausi used to say. But knitting was never her thing. Her love was embroidery. She loved to watch her Nani meticulously prick and dip the needle and gently pull them out; in and out, in and out and slowly as if out of magic; flowers, elephants, peacocks, village women would appear. It fascinated how stitch by stitch, inch by inch, a form appeared out of nothing. It had been her passion for long. But being married into an Iyer household and learning the customs that were almost alien, she just didn't get time for it.

2011-08-16T10:41:00.000-07:00

" India on the streets " by Chetan Bhagat

We have all had that one uncle who keeps on reminding you how India is terrible. He tells you about how every government authority takes bribes - from the RTO to the ration shop to the municipality. He will tell you how no government department does its job well - the potholed roads, abysmal conditions at government schools and poor healthcare all being examples to support your uncle's theory. It is hard to argue with him, for he is right. Things don't work. There is no justice. Power talks. Equality doesn't exist. All of this, even though uncomfortable to hear, rings somewhat true.

However, the uncle goes on to say this: "Nothing will ever change." He is convinced that our society is damaged irreparably, and India is destined to live in misery. Uncle Cynic goes on to doubt almost everyone, assumes the worst in people, and anyone who is trying to improve the country is branded as someone with a hidden agenda.

This is where i think the uncle gets it wrong, horribly wrong. For it is one thing to point out the problems, it is quite another to give up trying to fix them. Cynicism is not a counter-argument, it is an attitude. For the fact is we still have good people in the country: in society and even in government departments. It is just that they are crushed.

I don't want to give you the reasons why you must support Anna Hazare. It is almost beneath Anna's dignity that he actually has to beg or make a case for support when he is fighting for you, against an abusive, corrupt regime. Still, let me do a quick recap of the facts.

Anna did a fast in April, which became the nation's movement and spread virally. Concerned, the government agreed to make a good Lokpal Bill, shook hands with the activists and in principle agreed to Anna's version, designed to truly check corruption. Since then, the government has insulted Anna's team, thrown away their draft, and come up with its own almost pointless draft of the Lokpal Bill.

The draft the government is presenting to Parliament will not check corruption. Only 0.5%, or one in 200 government officials are under its purview. Your corrupt ration shop, RTO, passport office, panchayats or municipal authority will not be covered. State scams will not be covered - yes, the Adarsh society scam or the Jharkhand scams are all out of its purview. The prime minister is excluded as well. Ever heard of a corruption law in a democracy that only applies to a certain section of people?

The government is throwing magic dust in your eyes - and counting on India's illiterate and ignorant to not know the difference. However, you reading this are educated. You know when wrong is being committed. You know that while you have lived your life with corruption, you do not want your children to do the same. A bad Lokpal Bill may not affect you today - but tomorrow it will hit you when your child does not get a college seat, when your hospital gives shoddy treatment, when your government work doesn't get done. We live in a poor country - poor not because we don't have what it takes to be rich, but because our leaders have let us down. We have given them too much power, and they consider our vote as a mandate to steal and be incompetent. They hate accountability. However, without accountability, our progress will stall. There are countries where the average income per person is 50 times more than in India. Don't we deserve the same?

Thus, whatever your personal view on Anna, it is not him but his cause that needs support. The government can crush a few activists. However, it cannot crush India on the streets. A peaceful, firm, decisive protest is every Indian's birthright, and must be exercised in times of need. Come Monday, and we Indians have a job to do. We have to save our country's future.

A word for the government too. Just what exactly are you thinking when you are trying to shove an impotent law down people's throats? And what makes you feel that threatening, crushing or insulting Anna will take away people's need to rid India of corruption? Anna did not create an anti-corruption sentiment, he merely tapped into it. Crushing Anna will not take away that sentiment. It will just make it fester more. Right now, the movement is still controlled. By going back on your word, displaying arrogance and not listening to the people, you are risking the country's descent into chaos. Be careful. Accountability is much easier to deal with than anarchy. Fix the Lokpal Bill now, please.

Finally, for the people of India, it is time to prove Uncle Cynic wrong. There is a bigger truth than his 'nothing ever changes in India'. That truth comes from the Gita, which states "Nothing is permanent". The Gita also says, "When the pot of sin overflows, something happens to restore order." Now, it is up to you to determine if the pot of sin has overflowed. It is for you to say what it means for Indians to act out their dharma. And you, and only you, will decide if it is time to come on the streets.

I got this as a forward. makes a lot of sense. So thought I should share it here. Happy Independence Day!!!

what is life without friends....

2011-08-07T10:51:00.000-07:00

Well, I promised myself that I shall blog once a week, but madam muse ain't that kind today. So have to make do with a random post. Today is friendship day. It is strange how earlier it meant such a great deal, those bands, wearing yellow or white salwars declaring your love for your friends, thinking it is always going to be the same and will never change. Time fools us , and soon you know things around you change so much that you can hardly begin to recognise yourself. I am not talking about the 'grey hair, wrinkled nose' syndrome, but things beyond that. The madness which was so inherently a part of your growing years is now at the back seat.

This is what I thought but then came a group chat with all hyd frens 4 of us- safa, asmita and sneha and me.. making me believe that few things never change and madness continues:):):):)

Happy friendship day all

Truth or Lies

2011-07-29T11:15:00.000-07:00

In the dark corners of the mind
lies fear, anxiety and desperation
to strip naked and be true
unto me is what I want
But can you accept the truth?
Can you face the reality?
I cant be true without
hurting the people I love
I need to hence choose
Truth or the lie
Half baked truth or half baked lies
Neither will hurt you nor pain me.

Growing up

2011-07-28T12:55:00.000-07:00

Too many words unsaid,

perhaps for the best.

Convey my fears and pains,

sorrows but all in vain.

Falling in love used to be easy

now that too seems like work.

Since when did things become so hard?

Wish I never had to grow up..

The rains

2011-06-29T04:01:00.000-07:00

'Rains wash away your sins', her grandmother used to say. She doubted if today's rain can free her from this guilt and pain. Like a movie, scenes of her past came before her and she tried all kinds of explanations to justify her actions so that she could at least redeem herself in her eyes. God, was long forgotten. She neither believed nor disbelieved him and she hardly prayed Her mind was busy thinking of different scenarios , full of if onlys , yet the present continued to be as distasteful as before.Future was anyway bleak and present she didn't want to be in.

It was drizzling outside and she could see the rain drops gently kissing the blades of grass and those yellow daffodils in the garden, kissing the roads of the street and her rusty gate. She remembered what he said" You are perfect the way you are", and she desperately wanted to believe him if only she could wipe off her slate. She kept falling into the same trap, make the same old mistakes and succumb to the same old weakness. Every attempt to be strong and feel strong seemed futile.

The rain was now falling harder and she went to the courtyard. She went outside and stood in the rain and she let the rain kiss her face, her palms, her shoulders and got completely drenched. "Maybe it was true, rains do wash away your sins", She thought and smiled.

The lamb and the tyger

2011-06-29T03:31:00.000-07:00

The lamb was slaughtered today
Making way for the Tyger's reign
The body and mind in Tyger's claws
Cringed and cried in pain.
A thunderous roar staked the claim
over the splattered blood stains
"Is it fair?", you may ask
Soon a new born lamb cries in some lane.

P.s. This was written in response to William Blake's poem Tyger which you can find here
and the image is from google.com

Dedication

2011-06-14T11:07:00.000-07:00

24 timorese came from a faraway land

To see and learn all that they can...

Scared was I to see them all

doubted if I could handle them at all.

Soon they warmed up and spread their smiles

happiness all over SJEC and across the miles

Fathers and teachers and friends alike

began to fall for their charms in no time.

But soon tempers began to fly

Teachers too had to shout and make them cry.

Little by little progress they made

Universe and beyond did come to our aid

As I sit to write some lines today

To remember after the farewell day

I realised I am blessed with 24 angels

P.S. wrote this as a gift to all my students before they left to their country..

2011-06-13T09:50:00.000-07:00

A look and a touch
Throbbing desires
Maddening sensations.
Pleasurable pain
Painful pleasures.
Denial and hurt
Lies and manipulations
Anger and pain
Emptiness and void.

A bday post

2011-06-12T09:48:00.000-07:00

One is taught to believe life is supposed to make sense, one needs a goal and achieve the goal, fall in love, marry and have kids. Love again is supposed to be with this imperfect somebody who is supposed to be perfect for you. But there comes a time in life,when neither love nor life makes any sense. All the values that one cherishes on friendship, love , commitment , relations, success all fades out out and what remains are some vague ideas. Strangely a random stranger encounter can bring back the sense of identity or rather bring back the lost pieces of life. The randomness then seems like a careful design and the purpose lies to discover oneself better on all levels. To see life in a manner one has not seen before, to share moments that otherwise would have been mundane ...for all that and more, I thank you...

Dedicated to all those who have left an impression in my life and taught me something about me, helped to know me better.

P.s. I had a great bday:)

An ordinary love story II

2011-06-09T11:09:00.000-07:00

Lets just assume this is not the end. The Universe does give them a second. The story now doesn't seem that ordinary at all! Well the girl comes back and both confess their love and even went on a date. Now that sounds pretty ordinary, but when it is the first love it never is ordinary. The first teddy bear gift, the first lunch out and deciding to give long distance a shot. So.. so.. so.. and thus the long distance relation was sealed:)

Can their love survive the distance? Can any love survive the distance? One can only hope in love, to give up easily seems too dastardly and one must give love a chance. Somebody should. I'm glad they did.

Ex- boyfriend does lurk around somewhere waiting to play his role. Somebody should make this story un-ordinary ( I know there is no such term, but I prefer this to not-so- ordinary, so kindly bear) with ex boyfriend, boy and a girl it should make a perfect love triangle and there is nothing ordinary about a love triangle ( in spite of what Bollywood and Hollywood tells you).

So lets just assume love can survive distance and hope like a someone does in love and pray like someone in love and wait like someone in love.......

P.s. written on request for a sequel

An ordinary love story

2011-06-03T10:50:00.000-07:00

Everyone dreams of a love story, a perfect one that too. So did she and found it too. Well, but then Universe does have a strange sense of irony. He wasn't the type that went after the girls. No, it wasn't that he didn't like the chase, he was just plain shy. And she was just so friendly that it didn't seem right. While she thought he was way too perfect and sweet for her.

For a long time they kept ignoring the obvious, but Cupid isn’t the kind that can be ignored. Nah, he takes his business way too seriously. Once the arrows are struck, they leave a mark forever.By the time they realized the game of the Cupid and admitted the feelings, the Universe had to play the bad guy, and send her back to her land.

Happy ending are not for everyone. But who wants happy ending anyway? What is lost is what is remembered the most. The stolen kiss definitely is memorable, and has given her hope for many a passionate kisses that could have been shared. As always the imagined joys are sweeter than the reality.

P.s This post is written as a birthday gift to one of my dear student, Mirla. Happy Bday Mirla :)

2011-05-30T02:03:00.000-07:00

It is amazing how smallest of your wishes get fulfilled in strangest manners:)

The morning mist

2011-05-07T08:32:00.000-07:00

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 20; the twentieth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

The morning mist reminded him of her. It had been her ritual - staring across the window while Kantabai, served their morning coffee. He liked his coffee hot and strong and she preferred keeping her coffee waiting, just like she had kept him waiting all these years. He never really knew how to wait, Oh! He hated waiting, but she had taught him to wait.

Being a Assistant Director of a multinational company, he always had a hectic schedule. He wouldn’t call himself workaholic but she had always made fun of him, asking him to ‘ jump a little, dance a little, sing a little.’ He never really understood her- He couldn’t understand what could make someone stare for ages together at the clouds and trees.....

As he kept watching the morning mist, he didn't realize that his coffee had turned cold.....

'We can still be friends',
she said, after they broke up.
They never discussed the how
Nobody talks about the how anyway.
A year and half with her
was a long time for him.
But longer than that
was the time needed
to forget, to erase and to heal.
Like the rest in her life, He too slipped away.
Very slowly at first...
And soon she couldn't recall his name.
' We can still be friends'
thats what she said.

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Credits

Image - Window Rain Drops by Eric Alder
Courtesy - www.deviantart.com via www.blogaton.in

one picture

2011-05-06T11:23:00.000-07:00

I have really enjoyed this challenge. I thought writing this was too silly, but you never know until you attempt it. Have I grown with this challenge? Well, there are certain things that I have realised due to this challenege that I do have some regular readers :) (yay!) and I am more fortunate than I thought I was, more happy than I realised it, more in love with me than I imagined. So discovering this has only made me fall in love with me once again :)

SO I thought hard which pic of mine should I post. SOi decided to paint me using MS paint,It aint that great. My roomie made this finger painting for me- woman through whom the creativity blossoms. I thought I would do something like that but something else got made :)... SO i would like you to see the picture and tell me what it tells of me :)

2 songs

2011-05-05T06:56:00.000-07:00

Dance with me tonight from music and lyrics.. that one is for guruji...

Baanwara man dekhne chala from hazaro khwahishe aisen:

3 movies

2011-05-04T09:39:00.000-07:00

I LOVE watching movies and choosing 3 is very difficult.

3) 10 things I hate about you: Love Heathledger, an amazing actor, extremely cute and Julia stiles character reminded me lot of my roommate :) I am never tired of watching that movie again and again

2) Manichitrathazu- Mohanlal and Shobhana at their very best! Bestest movie in malayalam ever. Its after watching this movie that I decided to take up psychology :)My favorite scene is when Shobhana lifts the bed in anger when Suresh Gopi refuses to let her go shopping. MIndblowing scene!!!!!

1) Devdas by Sanjay leela Bhansali- I love it for the setting, dance, clothes,dialogues,music and MADHURI!!!! earlier during holidays I would goon youtube and keep watching 'kahe ched'. I have lost the count of how many times I have watched that song :)

4 books

2011-05-03T10:37:00.000-07:00

I do love reading but off late I have hardly been reading.

4) Anna Karenina: I LOVE this book by leo tolstoy. I had to reda it for the russian literature course that I did in my 1st yr in MA. The way the character of Anna is created, portrayed and written its brilliant. I could at some level understand her misery. Love Anna, LOve Tolstoy for creating her:)

3) To kill a mocking bird by Harper Lee: racism through eyes of a child portrayed with such sensitivity and simplicity. You HAVE to read this book. brilliantly written :)

2) Harry Potter series : I LOVE them a) they are well written, excellent choice of words. Iam not quite into fantasy literature but you have to give it to JKR for creating a new world. I grew up reading this book. I remember telling the story of Harry Potter to my bro with so much of drama that he started reading it as well . To my dismay, it meant competition once new books were released. Both of us fought to decide who will read it first. I saved up my scholarship money to buy the books, i refused birthday dress for harry potter, I WOKE UP and was at the book store at 7.30 am even before it could open to buy my new harry potter book ( 5th one) and yes,I own all the HP series :) interestingly the spiritual meaning behind the book is very deep, JKR s idea of Time and Death and very close to what Sri Sri says so I like it even more :)

1) Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte : My all time favorite love story- its a doomed love story of Heathcliff and Catherine. We had to study it in my 2nd year of degree and the character of Heathcliff is extremely complex, villainous and a great lover at the same time. beautifully written, compact precise and my favorite dialogue from the bookis what Catherine says about Heathcliff " Whatever our souls are made of, His and mine are the same ". and I cannot forget the way my lecturer taught that novel to us, more importantly I learnt to analyse a novel and write about it after rewriting the answer crazy number of times for my lecturer. So in a way the novel helped me grow as well:)

Choosing the books was very very hard. So i have to mention few other favorites as well. These are favorites because they have touched me/ affected me so profoundly/changed me/ made me believe in things/ made me smile/ been there for me when needed :)

Alchemist by paulo Coelho

Curious incident of the Dog in the night time

Malory Towers series by Enid Blyton

Love in Times of Cholera by Gabriel Marques ( love story of 2 old people :) MUST READ!)

Stumbling into infinity my Michael Fisherman

Autobiography of a Yogi

Diary of Anne Frank

5 food

2011-05-02T03:41:00.000-07:00

5) dark fantasy biscuits: I know probably I will be the one one, who will put biscuits under food and not snacks. That is how much I love cookies. and this one is my recent fascination. others are oatmeal biscuits, chocochip, 5 grain biscuits ( i forget the name), hide and seek etc etc

4) russian salad/ bread: I ate it first in my hostel mess :) and yes it was made really well.. generally love salads..bread butter jam.. bread- nutella, bread- cheese, bread- orange marmalade

3) pasta: I LOVE pasta.. my favorite food of all times. I ate it first when Dam cooked it, and then Sneha cooked. man! I love the pasta that Sneha cooks- cheese based, white cream pasta :) recently one that i had was in ashram prepared by Varun for Guruji :) It was MINDBLOWING!!! I had lunch already but had to eat this one:)

2) rasmalai: and yes, I believe sweets are food too ;) In fact at times I have them before the meal coz I dont really want to wait till I finished eating the whole meal to taste the dessert. I love bengali sweets, sandesh, rasgulla, champakali, kala jamun but favorite of all is rasmalai:)

1) ganji uta/ curd rice: I wouldn't have mentioned this if I hadn't been to Kamalashile. ganji Uta is basically boiled rice in water. It is simple man's food. But the way it is made in Kamalashile, ganji, vegetable and chutney ..slurp:)

curd rice cooked by my mum, with pickle and chutney and maybe some vegetable :)

The reason why I love the two is I do not have to bother mixing the curry and rice and buttermilk etc :) its all ready made :) they are lazy man's food ;)

there are many many food and yes, we vegetarians have lot of choices than you actually think. patrode ( konkani dish) all hyderabadi chutnies, DOSAAAA, roti, and ofcourse..

You might have noticed I have not mentioned mallu dishes, its strange coz I never was really fond of them except for chips, and avalos ladoos :)

Six Places

2011-05-01T08:34:00.000-07:00

6) Manali :) a very beautiful hill station up north. I went there with my classmates in 2nd year ofmy college. I loved the bus ride to manali, the snow capped mountains surrounding our hotel, shopping there and the trip to rotang pass. I would LOVE to go there again :)

5) My native place in thaliparambu. Our ancestral house which is now in ruins but I love going there ( I have been there like twice or thrice) The farms surrounding it, ancient house.. there is something in that air, the feeling that generations of your ancestors have been there before you telling you of the lost glory :)

4) Italy .. I would love to visit that place some day, travel around in the gondolas:)

3) Goa and Hyderabad :) Hyderabad coz that city has given me some amazing frens and has made me what I am today :) I should specify, EFL campus in Hyderabad, the sagar coffee shop, film clubs, golkonda fort, hussain sagar lake ( Its my favorite spot ), maula Ali ...

and Goa.. I Love the beaches in Goa, the food, the dancing .. a good place for a holiday:)

2) Ashraaaaaaaaaaaam:) 21st Km Kanakpura , Bangalore...If you haven't been there , please do go there.If there is heaven on earth , IT IS HERE! No more description, go visit!

1) Mangalore:) I didn't realize how much I love this city until I had to leave this city for 2 whole years. I couldn't imagine being in a place that had no beach or heavy rainfalls. I missed it all :)

This was good. there is one more place I would want to visit Chicago:) and eat the food cooked by this NRI fren.( who for some reason has turned into an amazing cook and I need to verify the claims :)

seven wants!

2011-04-30T09:40:00.000-07:00

7) TRAVEL!!! i wanna see the world.. go to Ireland, Greece, Rome, Africa, Taiwan.everywhere..

6) I want to get published

5) I would LOVE to paint my room, decide the colours,..may be have a story sketched on the walls..

4) SALSA and contemporary.. I would so wanna learn these dances. and better the belly dancing :) Contemporary coz its new and the chances to express yourself is lot more.. I and love the lifts.. and salsa coz I love the idea of dancing with someone, being in sync with the other person. U learn about knowing the moves without talking and belly dancing is sexy and meditative :)

3) I would want to learn cooking someday ( yeah.. that want is there. I imagine that magically I ll turn into this amazing cook who can make yummy cookies and bake cakes.. Right now, I am not ready to devote time for it.

2) THEATRE!!! I would love to act in a play! A musical perhaps that involves dancing and acting both..maybe direct one too.

1) I would want to go rock climbing, bungee jumping, river rafting, scuba dving.. I would wanna do all that before I die..

This was fun :) I haven't mentioned enlightenment coz I believe Guruji is already taking care of it. Its his job now :) and I am surprised I haven't mentioned marriage in this list!. ( may be I am not as desperate as I thought I was)

Eight Fears

2011-04-29T09:56:00.000-07:00

8) Fear of being forgotten by people..

7) fear that my writing aint great..

6) fear that I am not doing justice to my life

5) Used to fear water..it has reduced a great deal though

4) used to fear dogs, that is taken care as well.

3) .. 2).. 1)...

Now I will just have to make up stuff..used to fear death, losing people etc etc.. But I guess with meditation,they slowly begin to slip away.

I did not like writing this one :(

The Journey

2011-04-28T10:45:00.000-07:00

The road lead to nowhere and he stared at it for a long time. Finally, Simon decided to take that road. Oh, I forgot to introduce Simon to you, the most uncomplicated person on the planet with non-conflicting thoughts and conflicting emotions. I know that seems an impossible combination, but then writers cant have the same old tall, dark handsome characters or the Machiavellian types. So here is an improbable character making an equally improbable journey to nowhere.

When Simon was 5, he wanted to be a truck driver. He loved watching huge red trucks that was driven and fancied owning one when he grew much bigger. When he was 8, he wanted to own a farm like his grandfather did. He could drive the tractor all day long, watch the huge fields, yell at the labourers and in the evenings sit and listen to jazz just like his grandfather did. By the time he was 13 he had decided to be a pilot so that he could fly to different places; Australia, Malaysia, and all the other countries that the geography teacher used to talk about.

At 25,you would expect him to have it all figured out, engineering didn't help with that and hence the road to nowhere. Is there a city called nowhere? Yes, there is. In Simon's mind, it is all very true, very real.

p.s. the character in the story is named after my student in class.I had promised him that I will write a story for him. Rest all is fictional, only the name is borrowed :)

9 loves

2011-04-28T09:56:00.000-07:00

9) I love watching romantic comedies, not tear jerks but feel good, awww types

8) well cooked vegetarian food, i love looking at it, smelling it :)

7) I love to stare blankly at the sky, watch the birds fly and watch the trees dance in the wind. Its really nice to watch the coconut trees especially when there is heavy winds,they simply dance like there is no tomorrow.

6) I love window shopping, in fact i love window shopping better than the actual shopping :)

5) I LOVE walking barefoot on grass..i love to feel the grass under my feet or even lying down on the grass and watching the stars.

4) I love the smell of coffee!!! thats why I love coffee day, the smell and the chairs :)

3) strolling in the beach,playing in the beach, sitting and watching beach, running around the beach..basically beach :) :) :)

2) my cellphone and my laptop.. I love them both:)

1) I love the smell of the first rain, i love rains..rains make me really happy and I LOVE dancing in the rain :) :) :)

I thought this would be difficult, but it wasn't. In fact there are many more things that I like..I love dance, colours, I love the feel of silk on the skin, I love to get a new look once in a while, but i dont do anything drastically different ( i do dream of it though), I would love to be published someday, paint, i love to walk, I love living basically..every second. No matter how much i crib, I LOVE living my life.. most of all, i couldn't put it anywhere in the list coz its beyond them all. I LOVE the fact that I am so lucky to have a living master!! SO Goddam lucky !!!

10 secrets

2011-04-27T10:32:00.000-07:00

Okies! so this is the challenge that I happened to come across in one blog so I thought, "Why not?"

10 secrets

10. Used to fear writing earlier.. BIG time. Although I had lot of ideas I never wrote.

9. I get butterflies in my stomach just before I am about to go to stage especially if it is dance. No matter how many stage shows , I have done, I still get butterflies.

8. I love to day dream, in fact most of the time I am spaced and I love it :)

7. Is an cell phone addict. Keep checking my phone formessages and I am very happy when I receive one. ( even if it is a forward)

6. I am extremely bad at keeping in touch with people.

5. I can be physically violent at times.. I hit people for fun but it hurts them . ( its totally true!)

4. I find it tough to be assertive.. still working on my assertive skills :) although I think guruji is looking into that :)

3. I do NOT like dark chocolate or mint chocolates.I love the rest.

2. I cant reverse a car to save my life!really bad although I do have a driving license .

1. I do not understand subtle expressions of feelings.I prefer the direct way. no nonsense. and as much as i love watching mush movies and melodrama, in real life I do not prefer drama.

ah! I am done. Was difficult at first, but them flow was better later. Guess I amgoing to enjoy the challenge after all :)

The summer

2011-04-20T11:20:00.000-07:00

Summer romances are never meant to last. She didn't know how it happened, she wasn't the kind that believed in cheating, she would certainly not advocate it. She didn't know if it was love. May be it was, may be it wasn't.But the pain,that was definitely there and she knew that was real. Why should she cry after all? She was going to get married to the guy who loved her to death but she wanted someone who gave her reasons to live. Sweetest things in life are always short lived, she had to let go and think of the life ahead.

*****

He knew she was engaged to someone else. What attracted him was her spirit to live, the will to survive against all odds, that perhaps kept their hopes alive.. a hope to change life's fortune to their favour. Somebody has asked him," Was it love or just an attraction?" He didn't really know the answer to that one. For the first time in his life, he was happy, it was indeed the best summer of his life. And in a month's time she would be married and he would be forgotten.

*****

He refused to believe that she could cheat on him. He loved her more than he loved himself,he worshipped her. He couldn't bear the idea of losing her. He was willing to forgive her and take her back. He knew she wasn't happy now,but he would prove her that their love was indeed true. "Summer romances never last and they never will", he thought to himself and smiled.

Tell me that you love me....

2011-04-15T11:09:00.000-07:00

Tell me that you love me..

Tell me you will stay with me..

Tell me that you will be by my side

Thick and thin, through all times.

Tell me that I am wrong

Tell me that I can be strong

Tell me that we can make it

Tell me that you are mine...

Am I asking too much?

All I want is some love.

Tell me that you love me

and I will love you back.

To those who are missed a lot...

2011-04-11T08:57:00.000-07:00

I sat to write a poem or even a simple blogpost on the bday of a very dear twin...found it extremely difficult... There are very few people in my life who I cant write about. I for one, am a very expressive person. Its easy for me to say " I love you"or " I miss you" . But certain people, writing about them is either painful or they are so special that it is just impossible to put it in words.... This post is dedicated to all such people in my life ...

2011-03-31T12:01:00.001-07:00

There are few people in life

that you meet

who stay for a short while

and then leave memories behind!

pain

2011-03-20T10:39:00.000-07:00

pain beyond pain...

you wish it would all end one day

but wishes hardly come true

nothing seems real

but this pain

aah! that is the only thing that is real

you can feel it..

they say, you can feel love too

but that can always go wrong

but pain, it is always real

coz it is always there

sometimes less obvious

sometimes right in front of you..

but its always there in you

manavathe

2011-03-18T11:39:00.000-07:00

so much talk about manavathe project going around, I had to post about it. Manavathe is a govt of karnataka project to give yes plus course for free to 35,000 youth across the govt colleges in the state. ( in 3 weeks) Afte having delayed the project for long, it FINALLY began. When it did initially began, i was a volunteer. Me and my other self attended the first ever meeting. I had wished then to be a part of this gigantic project. It was a prayer then, little did I know, I would have a quite a role to play there.

Once it began finally, I was scared. Scared because, I never have done anything like this before. Was so used to having my other half around me, caring this out felt scary. things like delegating, getting work done over phone, finance, paper work is something I never thought I could handle... But I guess one can always learn that.. thats the beauty here. space to stretch yourself, above and beyond...

2011-02-28T00:23:00.001-08:00

Living a dream....

2011-02-23T11:25:00.000-08:00

I just realised that my blog is 2 years old now :) Happy birthday my dear blog :) thanks to the person who invented blogging if it wasnt for you, I wouldnt have written so much!. :)

2011-02-23T10:39:00.000-08:00

Somebody told me words like 'never' and 'forever' don't exist. Is it really so? It is all relative and nothing is absolute? Why then do we run behind forevers and hold on to the nevers? Where did this need for absoluteness come from? We seek assurance and absolute certainty, yet momentary assurance and momentary certainty is all we get.
Then the merry go round goes again. round and round and round, coming back to the same spot. Like always. Like ever before.Nothing changes. You go all around only to come back to the same spot. The spot where it all began, where the ride began. Round and round and round.

We can still be friends.

2011-02-18T10:03:00.000-08:00

'We can still be friends',

she said, after they broke up.

They never discussed the how

Nobody talks about the how anyway.

A year and half with her

was a long time for him.

But longer than that

was the time needed

to forget, to erase and to heal.

Like the rest in her life, He too slipped away.

Very slowly at first...

And soon she couldn't recall his name.

' We can still be friends'

thats what she said.

2011-02-06T08:41:00.000-08:00

randomness doesn't seem random any more.

2011-01-25T10:47:00.000-08:00

She could afford to cry today. There was no shoot tomorrow. In profession like hers crying was a luxury. She had to look beautiful, that was why she was paid. She was paid to smile, and look beautiful.....

As a child, she was proud of being the beautiful daughter. She was the centre of attention at the weddings, birthday parties and other functions. She liked being noticed and it was her mothers dream that she become the face of the nation. Ms India , the day she won the title, her mother was the happiest person. She felt like she has achieved it all. But now, it felt like a curse....

Yes, a curse. She hated having to smile at them all. She hated being polite and dignified. She hated being everyone's doll. She hated having to be beautiful....

But today, she would cry. All the unshed tears began to pour down. She wept like a baby. Strangely after a many years, she felt alive and human and she wept again..

You and I

2011-01-25T10:43:00.000-08:00

If only I had known, it was to be our last ride together
the last time together
I would have perhaps created a memory for us...

You and I, we were never meant to be,
Yet lies a tiny hope somewhere to save something of "us"
And then I realise there never was' "us"

All there was, was a fragmented dream.
Nothing remained to hold on to..
it was like you and I never existed.

randomness

2010-12-29T22:44:00.000-08:00

Yesterday went away like a dream and I thank you for making it so beautiful. I am yet to know what life is all about as I see it passing by me so quickly, I get scared.
A need for a partner exists so that somebody can witness your life, a need for children so that you continue to remain after you die, a need to be remembered long after you are gone.... All these needs drive you to work for society, family, friends and what not...
Yet, as I live, I fail to witness my own life! It is such an irony.. Even after knowing its all in me, and I just need to be, I continue running around, It is an irony...

2010-12-10T06:41:00.000-08:00

seva

2010-12-06T09:46:00.000-08:00

happened to see a used chewing gum fallen on the road and i decided to take paper wrap it and throw it away. i realised then that this is true seva. i didn't know whose day was saved or if anybody looked at me or not and it happens spontaneously. that is why seva is insisted in AOL to make it a part of you. that in anyway doesn't mean, your seva is just restricted to AOL. make your every action seva, spontaneous action with absolute joy with no expectation:)

waiting...

2010-11-24T08:26:00.000-08:00

Waiting for a tiny nod, waiting for a look,
waiting for that twinkle in the eye
waiting for that smile..

waiting to hear that voice
waiting to hear that sweet murmur again

Waiting for a just another ride,
to be there in that moment
when the world ceases to exist for both.

.........................

2010-11-11T20:04:00.000-08:00

It was an imagined city full of imagined people with imagined stories to tell. Untouched by reality, floating in the dreams, destiny changing at your will. She lived there almost all the time.. Life around her held no meaning, she preferred to live in the imagined city. You may think she is crazy, but for her, you are just one of the imagined people from the imagined city telling her an imagined story.

2010-11-11T05:22:00.000-08:00

I made this brochure a year ago for YES!+ and it turned out quite well..

Sorry

2010-10-01T10:25:00.000-07:00

‘Sorry' she said

'Fine' I replied.

'Sorry' she said again

Loud and clear this time.

'Why?' I thought,

It mattered no more.

All I wanted

was to know

that you cared

that you loved

and that I mattered.

But instead she said,

"Sorry."

outside the window

2010-09-24T11:05:00.000-07:00

Just a glance

2010-09-22T10:33:00.000-07:00

You couldn't call it a relationship. Not theirs. But its just that she was used to seeing him now everyday, it seemed like one. Everyday as she waved her husband and kids goodbye from her balcony, she would wait for him to come out. All she needed was a glance and she was happy with it. She didn't know his name. Neither did he. At least thats what she thought. She knew he was in the field of advertising, Mrs Rathna from 405 had told her. She knew for sure he was single, no girls visited him. Just a couple of guy friends. (You cant help noticing things these stuff when you are a neighbour next door.) She hoped she wasn't gay, he didn't look like one. He always dressed in plain light coloured, clean pressed shirts with black stripped pants.

It wasn't that she had an unhappy married life. A Husband who adored her, kids who loved her but her life was always predictable and she liked looking forward to something. It wasn't like she was cheating on her husband. But there was some joy in just dreaming and not realising it. No sweet nothings, no tiny kisses, no declaration of love, no possession of love. Just a little glance that is all.

moonlight

2010-09-22T10:27:00.000-07:00

new hobby

2010-09-13T08:44:00.000-07:00

The lady in red

a gift

Made these using MS paint :) 2nd one was a gift to my friend Vini and Ratheesh on her engagement and i missed out the ring:) have to redo it :)

randomness

2010-08-30T10:43:00.000-07:00

All my life, I valued friends a lot. I have worked on relations, loved and given a lot. Hurt people too at times. All this while I had a feeling that I mattered after all, I am cared after all. But a point comes in your life, when you begin to question every relation around you. What is friendship all about? Is it sharing bits of your life with someone? or just being there? What if the other person, ain't sharing.. then? Does that mean you are valued less? Or that you are just expecting more?
Relationship equations are extremely weird. It is difficult to judge a relation by someone 's actions yet you only have actions to vouch for. Words are anyway flimsy, if you see that way, actions are flimsy too. To know love and seek happiness is an eternal need. To seek that in a relationship is stupidity, to seek in a friendship even more stupid......

2010-08-30T10:34:00.000-07:00

Dear Someone who gave me a favourite memory,

Of all times I have spent with you, every walk that we walked together, my most favourite would be the moonlight stroll.I don't really have words to describe what I felt but it was both the best and the hardest thing I had to do in my life. I am generally who is honest with her friends, thank you for letting me be at my honest best and thank you for taking it so well.

Take Care,
God Bless

Shar.

2010-08-30T10:26:00.000-07:00

Dear Someone I don’t talk to as much as I’d like to,

You are one of the most crazy people I have met in my lives ( trust me, I know many of those) and I wish I could spend some more valuable (?) crazy time with ya... you are one of those people, who leave behind a smile on my face, every time I meet ya :) . You know I would really want to write some more cheesy lines, damn I my brains ain't working now. Let me just dedicate cheesiest song to you :D

"every night in my dreams I see you"
mwahahahahahah
love.
Take Care,
Shar

2010-08-30T10:19:00.000-07:00

Dear Someone I drifted away from,

I miss us chatting every night. I miss those silly jokes. I miss those whiny moments and I miss us talking utterly nonsense stuff. I miss sharing those silly details.. Sigh! I wish I never had to grow up. I wish I could just rewind and spend one more day in the college. I wish we didn't have to work all day and be so busy and have no time for people that matter the most.
Just wanted to let you know, that you do matter. Whether I say so or not..
Take care
God bless.

2010-08-30T10:10:00.000-07:00

Dear Someone from my childhood,

I have no clue where you are right now, but thanks a million tons for playing all sorts of nonsensical games with me and also for putting up with me when I slapped you super hard. It was great having you as neighbour and running into your house to watch tv/ play house house and teacher teacher and of course the catching games. For all those memories and more thanks a gazillion :)

Something new

2010-08-30T09:57:00.000-07:00

This is something that I came across months ago and thought about posting few posts on this. It is called a 30 letter tag. It requires me to tag these letters and I thought this should be an interesting one. So the list of the letters are:

Your Crush
Your Best friend
Your parents
Your sibling (or closest relative)
Your dreams
A stranger
Your favorite internet friend
Your Ex boyfriend/ girlfriend/crush
Someone you wish you could meet
Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Someone you wish could forgive you
Someone you’ve drifted away from
The person you miss the most
Someone that’s not in your state/country
Someone from your childhood
Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
The one that broke your heart the hardest
The person that you wish you could be
Someone you judged by their first impression
Someone you want to give a second chance to
The last person you kissed
The person that gave you your favourite memory
The person you know that is going through the worst of times
The last person you made a pinky promise to
The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Someone that changed your life
The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Your reflection in the mirror

An Introduction

2010-07-30T10:46:00.000-07:00

How shall I define Me?

Have I known this Me?

I think not.

Yet I am told to introduce Me

So, I begin to summon the words,

weaving them together in magic.

The Angel sends: smart, caring

beautiful,kind, sweet , friendly

lovely, affectionate, cute,

energetic, funny...

All the Best words have come today

To make you love me,

admire me and respect me...

Can these words win me respect?

Can they guarantee love in life?

Painted lies and painted truth are alike

Tell you, the whole truth I must

So I call the Devil who brings along

shabby, chaotic,wild,

Egoist and restless.

More words to define me.

But somehow these words fall short.

I am more than these words,

They cannot contain me.

I am more than the Angel and the Devil in me.

I touch them all and go beyond

Encompassing them all within me, into me

And spreading across 'joy' that is truely me.

P.s. I have been asked to introduce myself in a staff meeting and hence the poem :)

2010-07-29T09:32:00.000-07:00

Waiting for that one glimpse of the desert king...

Guru Poornima

2010-07-25T11:25:00.000-07:00

From a person who never really understood what life meant and thought it was all about setting goals, achieving them, getting a good job and making my family proud. But now past 7 years the definition has undergone a huge change. In this journey of knowing myself and thereby the world and society, I have met many a people who have had a major impact in this journey. To all my Gurus, right from my mother, my teachers in school, my dance teacher, my sangeeta teacher, my leactuers in college, my guide in PG, and in the spiritual path, My basic course tecaher Shenoy Maam, Chayanna, Bawa, Nandi, Sunilanna, Ilakka, Vinayakka, Vivekanna

That one person who binded us all together and has carefully chosen such gems in my life, my master, His Holiness, Sri Sri Ravi Shankar and I am so grateful to be sharing my lifetime with Him. On this day of Guru Poornima, with all the love and gratitude that a person has and more, I thank each one of them and to all those souls that have taught me and made me the person that I am today:) Today in satsang, Vinayakka said something about spreading a wave of devotion all across mangalore, let the wave of love and peace engulf this whole world and that is the only prayer that I can make :)

Happy Guru Poornima to all

jgd, lots and lots of love,

Sharika

My name is Khan

2010-07-25T10:50:00.000-07:00

I know this is late, but I had to write about this movie. I watched yesterday on a dvd that I rented a month ago and I must say the movie moved me. Ofcourse, there was a lot of filmy drama but loved the message that it brought out in the end. The cast was amazing, especially Sharukh ( though there are scenes where he forgets that he has Aspergers and acts like a super hero, but I shall forgive him for this) and ofcourse we have kajol, who was amazing as usual especially in the scene where she loses her son. Shankar Ehsaan Loy provided a magic touch with their music and numbers like'tere naina' and 'noor e khuda' is simply wonderful.

Interesting point that I thought was, would the movie have worked if the protagonist was not Aspergers. I mean, it was not considered 'normal' ( in layman's terms) and hence it was possible to imagine him to spread the message of peace and love. If the hero was an ordinary person wanting to spread peace would it have made the same impact?

It definetly strenghtened my resolve to spread the message of peace and love of my Master so much more. There is no roomfor hatred in this world. The movie does show and people who hate also suffer and kudos to karan Johar for attempting such a movie. I suggest all those who havent watched it yet, to watch it :)

P.s More importantly depiction of the disorder was more or less accurate. Usually it so happens in the name of creativity wrong notions are spread but thankfully that was avoided here.

The Enemy

2010-07-23T00:45:00.000-07:00

And the snake raises its hood again
silent and bidding for the right time
to strike and destroy..
The snake has raised its hood again.

What does it want today?
what will it destroy this time?
No one knows.
The snake has raised its hood again.

Silent curses and the memory
of that last bite still fresh
Uncertainty, fear and a cold heart.
The snake raises its hood again.

Who shall strike first
Me or Him? Me or Him?
Its a game of waiting this time..
The snake has raised its hood again.

Story VII- Final piece

2010-07-19T10:45:00.001-07:00

Every relationship she had been in, she thought it would last. Hoped and prayed. Now that He was willing to offer it, she turned it down and ran away before she felt weak. Was she afraid of "forever and ever afters"? All her life, she has been wanting to settle down, with that one someone who she could share her her everyday secrets, laugh and even cry and be herself. Now that she was here, in Kerala on a vacation alone for the first time, she didn't feel alone. Even in her apartment in Banjara, she lived alone, yet going to an empty always reminded her of her loneliness, that loneliness now felt like freedom.

Nikki looked around the restaurant and saw couples, families, friends and for the first time, she was not envious. She smiled. A real smile, as she drank her coffee. She had been searching for a missing piece to complete herself, not realizing she was born a complete picture, true to itself.

Story VI

2010-07-07T11:23:00.000-07:00

Now that Nikki was in Kerala, she should have been fine right? New place, New people to meet. Yet this mind and heart was still the same. She had left it behind in Hyderabad... the urge to call him, was so strong. She only wanted to hear his again. To tell her that it would be all right and she should just trust him. She still had a choice. Sigh! The choice!

It was a choice that she made 4 years ago...to be a second fiddle, to shatter some child's dream, to wreck a marriage and live with that guilt. That guilt tasted sweet, too sweet until her stomach began to cry 'no more'.

**********

He met her the same place they met the first time to tell her that he had made a decision. He wanted her. He was willing to walk out of 15 years of marriage for her sake. He was willing to leave behind his son to be with her. He was willing to offer her all that she ever dreamed off and even more. A marriage and a life! And yet she walked out on him, on them and their future.

***********

Now that Nikki thought of it, agreeing to be someone's mistress seeemed easier than to be someone's wife. Strange!

Story V

2010-07-02T11:34:00.000-07:00

Love.. that seemed today like an empty word. As she sat, watching people from the window that oversaw the neighbourhood park, she saw the empty swing, wet in rain, drenched completely, alone..just like her..She knew she could get past this, she had seen worse in life and yet right now, her heart was shattered into so many tiny pieces that it was almost impossible to count.

Time, they say is a great healer. May be a change of place would help. Nikki went over to the telephone directory, and searched for travel agents and dialled the first number she saw.-040-543217 . It belonged to some Vishal Travel Agents . It had been a long time since she had taken a break, with weekends being spent with him, she never really had a chance for a holiday, not since 4 years. The lady over the was briefing her about different plans that was available for the weekend; Hampi, Mangalore, Goa, Chennai,... She loved beaches but she knew people in Goa. That wouldn't do. She really wasn't into architecture stuff, so that rules out Hampi, Mangalore didn't sound interesting enough and Chennai was crowded. She screwed her lips when she saw her choices.

" Madam, would you be interested in Kerala? Weekend might be too short a trip though."

Kerala... she knew no one there nor has she ever been there. " That will be perfect. Could you please book the ticket for me? "

Demons in me

2010-06-18T12:19:00.000-07:00

Tried and tested so many ways to put the demons to rest. They are born out of me and exist because of me. So how come they seem more powerful than me? Are they truly more powerful than me or I have merely assumed it? Where lies the power then? In that which is my creation and reside in me or the whole of me? If the demons are created by me, they can be destroyed by me as well.. But then as long as I exist, demons exist too. So, the only way to destroy them is to destroy myself. Is there any other way?

Tale of wordsII

2010-06-16T13:00:00.000-07:00

the first part of the story: Tale of words.

What keeps the words together? What gives them meaning? Words have no existence without the meaning. Meaning gives life to every word. But words in itself have no meaning, who gives them the meaning? What keeps the words together?

A and B thought hard to secret behind words. They needed to know the tale of words and only person knew it.

Reflection

2010-06-16T12:36:00.001-07:00

I look at the tubes and the pipes
the machine that measures the pulse
Doctors with forceps, scalpel
and a body half slit open.

Operation theater it is;
the final act of my play
Only I have no lines this time,
Merely lie and wait for the exit.

Lifetimes of suffering
Now comes to an end
I feel no pain now..
I only feel numb.

Things to know before you fall in love!

2010-06-15T12:59:00.000-07:00

Before you fall in love,
make sure you brace yourself
with a helmet and a guard,
a pair of boxing gloves,
and good pair of shoes
(for a quick getaway)
Few bottles of Gatorade;
is sure to do you some good.

These sure can be of some help
to save you from disasters unknown
But who is to save you
from calamities of your heart?
Your mind and soul trapped
in the eyes of someone,
in the smile of someone,
within the heart of someone!

StoryIV

2010-06-15T12:09:00.000-07:00

Nikki never thought she would be one of those clingy types. She was brought up to be a strong independent woman; her job and her flat in Banjara Hills; (one of the costliest areas in Hyderabad, mind you!)should be proof enough. Not that she minded him going back to his wife on weekdays, weekends were always for her. That was the arrangement. Yet the times she didn't get to see him, times he didn't answer her phone or reply to her messages, she felt alone and lost.

*******

"What is your biggest fear?" he had asked her on the first meeting.
" Failure," she replied.
" No ," he pressed again,"I asked the biggest fear?"
" That is my biggest fear." (It was partly true. I mean, I do sometimes fear what would happen to me if i lost my job and stuff right?)
" No, You are lying."
"Are you trying to psychoanalyse me , mister?"
" May be,I am" and he smiles. (Oh God! The Guy has a killer smile.No!No!. You can't be falling for a smile!)
She laughed. The truth was she just couldn't admit to her fear yet. People did see her as a confidant, modern woman, but like all , she was as scared as anyone. Afraid of making mistakes, afraid of turning out to be big failure, afraid that people around do not like her, afraid that one day if she dies, there would be no one to cry for her. But that was not what scared her the most, no matter how much she tried to change it, it just remained deep within her heart.

However, things had changed after she had met him. She had learned to take a chance, a chance in love and allowed herself to get hurt,... the betrayal and distrust and lies and some more lies.... And finally learnt that although her fears were well grounded, she could sometimes take a chance....

Gift from a friend!

2010-06-15T10:15:00.000-07:00

This was made for me by my friend in hyderabad, Saurov. He has used paint software to make this one and I think spent 2-3 hours over this one :)

StoryIII

2010-06-10T13:12:00.000-07:00

The first look,the first talk, the first touch, the first kiss are always special. So was this first meeting. Nikki knew instinctively she would never forget that day. How could she end up talking somuch and sharing so much to a total random stranger? He knew exactly what to tell her and one of those rare people who knew when to talk and when to listen. Most people end up opening their mouthtraps with either their advise or "It happened to me too and you know what I did?" (Who cares what you did? Seriously, If I am in some shit, do I care you went through it as well. It is my turn to grumble, don't bring in your miseries as well)

He wasn't like all other men she had met. Initially she thought it was just that novelty that made him so special, you know, new boyfriend is always special. But then what they had shared was definitely special ( at least to her) and something amazing which she hadn't felt with any one before. He made her feel secured, something that she hadn't felt since she was 13.

He was right for and all wrong for her too. (How can anybody be that way!)That is what made him so special. She decided to take a chance when she said 'yes' even after knowing that he was married!

StoryII

2010-06-08T10:46:00.000-07:00

People said they weren't right for each other. Friends warned her, he wasn't her type. But she was in love, madly in love. That is the problem with love. Not only is it blind, but deaf and dumb too. You stop using your faculties of mind, it stops working and heart takes over completely. Thats what happened to her when she met him for the first time. She never believed in love at 1st sight, yet that day..
It was 24th may, 2007 they met at a coffee house. She had a bad day that day and the friend who was supposed to meet her in the coffee house, stood her up. It was awkward to sit alone in a coffee house and sip coffee alone, " height of loneliness," she thought. Thats true, she was lonely. Well, she did have friends. making friends was always easy for her. But none of them knew her. There was Megs a.k.a Meghna Mathur, her roomie whom she could always rely on, there was Siddharth, a cute guy in office who has now come to be her new friend whom she shared stuff with ( coz Megs now has a boyfriend) and who she had a teeny weeny crush on. She was lost in her thoughts, that's when she caught him staring at her through his book and to her surprise, he walked up to her and sat right across her on the table...

My favourite movieee quotes!

2010-06-08T09:09:00.000-07:00

Carpe, carpe diem, seize the day boys, make your lives extraordinary.- Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society.

We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for. - Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society

I always thought the idea of education was to learn to think for yourself. -Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society

Truth like-like a blanket that always leaves your feet cold. You push it, stretch it, it'll never be enough. You kick at it, beat it, it'll never cover any of us. From the moment we enter crying t-to the moment we leave dying, it'll just cover your face as you wail and cry and scream.- Ethan Hawke in Dead Poets Society

Now we all have a great need for acceptance, but you must trust that your beliefs are unique, your own, even though others may think them odd or unpopular, even though the herd may go,
Boys, you must strive to find your own voice. Because the longer you wait to begin, the less likely you are to find it at all. Thoreau said, "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation." Don't be resigned to that. Break out! - Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society

The sweet is never as sweet without the sour. -Noah Taylor in Vanilla Sky

every passing minute is a another chance to turn it all around. -Penolope Cruz in Vanilla Sky

Tale of words

2010-06-07T10:19:00.000-07:00

A has been trying to write for a long time now. He couldn't find his words. He called them out loud. they didn't come. B comes to the rescue. A and B together go and search for some words. They go up North, and then to the East and West and finally to the South. They did find lot a words but there was a problem. A and B tried to put them all together, but they didn't seem to belong there. They tried all permutations and combinations, yet words seem to make no sense. What was missing?

How would you want to end the story? am kinda stuck. Will come back a week later. You can give in your endings :D

Goodbye!

2010-06-07T10:10:00.000-07:00

This is something that I made for Nive as a farewell gift. Picture below is the original picture, first one is a camera trick! and the idea is copied from my roomie sukanya who made something similar to another roomie abu :D

StoryI

2010-06-04T12:39:00.000-07:00

"And I thought, I knew him. I thought I knew him inside out. How do you know, know a person? You think you know, and then bam! Life surprises you, mocks at you, at your stupidity, at your knowings, "Nikki kept thinking this as she kept walking in the rain. She normally loved to walk in the rain, but then today was not a normal day. One of those days, where you think life has cheated on you.

She thought of many things as she walked. She forgot that she normally took a bus home. She kept walking, thinking of what went wrong, where she went wrong. You cant rewind your life and undo things. If only she could do it, this one time... just this one time.

to be continued.....

P.s. all the characters are imaginary and coincidences, if any, is no fault of the author

A borrowed life

2010-06-04T11:20:00.000-07:00

You see this room?

Nothing here is mine.

Clothes in the hanger, in the dryer

the books and CDs on the shelf,

shoes on the rack.

None of it, is mine.

They stay here, like me

as if on a visit.

I see a face in the mirror,

the image; is not me.

a stranger to myself..

many a thoughts in the head

feelings of the heart

words that say them all..

Again don't belong to me.

A Borrowed life,indeed it is.

Time for some male bashing

2010-06-02T05:41:00.000-07:00

Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up :)

Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Duh! He is a man.

Q: If you drop a man and brick out of a plane, which would hit the ground first?
A: Who cares?

Q: What makes men chase women when they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes a dog chase vehicles when they have no intention of driving:D :D :D :D :D

The Battle of colours II

2010-04-23T11:20:00.000-07:00

Since I was asked to give a resolution to the story, this is how I ended it in the final draft. for the first half of the story click here

Who sang the song? Who did that voice belong to? Why isn’t he able to hear it today? “Sing to me! Let me hear that music again. Why are you so hidden? Come and let me paint thee, give you a form, a life and dress you in various shades!”, He cried out aloud. It was then that he realized that a perfect picture cannot be redone. Any attempt to do is futile and pointless. Somebody needs to tell this to the colours

The Tree of Knowledge

2010-04-22T10:19:00.000-07:00

The Tree of knowledge beckons you all
To taste the forbidden apple.
Ten in number have we got them for you
Each giving you the knowledge right.
Hidden from all eyes, beneath the seat
Find them and be rich.
And hence I sing this song to you
Find them and be rich!

I am forgotten here, No one comes to me anymore
While my friend lies in one of your classrooms
Old and battered in the floor high above.
My dear brother a pompous snob,
Gets to see the events with the mob.
And my father is so tall a guy
Bigger hall you need for him to buy.
My mother dear all so sweet
Seated with the lady in waiting
Waiting and Watching, people come by.
Near her sit five black men
And there lives my cousin Ben.
Loves the bare cushion, my sister so
Lies next to it, very low.
My granny lives alone below
Hidden in an underground cell
Food is what my Uncle loves
Eat and drink is what he is doing now.
Best of all is my baby bright
Hiding away from the limelight.
Five black men guard her tight
Now begone and find them all right.

*******
P.s. This was a part of the treasure hunt that was organised by Me and the juniors for the final year students. The task was to decipher the clues and find the treasure:)

The Battle of colours

2010-04-21T11:15:00.000-07:00

I have a story to tell. No, it does not have fairies, or goblins or even happily ever after for that matter. It is not my story, it is of the colours. They had a story to tell once, of paints and of feelings. Green, Red, Orange, White, Yellow, Blue and Black lived together in a canvas. It wasn’t one of those canvases where you have nice little houses painted in red and white, green trees and blue skies but rather a a patch work with few blotches of paint here and there. But then, these blotches had a pattern. It mostly contained Orange and Black with a little of Red in form of a tree with yellow, white and blue leaves and Green at the bottom.

Green wasn’t quite happy being at the bottom. With Black and Orange taking most of the space, which he thought wasn’t fair, Green felt he deserved more. He spoke about it to Yellow. Yellow was friends with all in the canvas. He and Orange were best friends, so space wasn’t quite a problem there. White was the sweet neighbour, he loved being in the canvas and wanted all to live happily. Blue couldn’t be bothered with talks. He never mingled much. That left with Red. In the evenings Red and Green would meet over coffee to gossip and bitch. “ It is unfair that Black and Orange should own so much space in canvas, “ said Green. Red sipping coffee replied, “ Yeah, that’s true. All that talk about equality is all a sham. Never practiced anywhere, in society nor in this bloody canvas.”

Green: “ Nobody gets to see me, Its all them that they notice. ‘ Oh look at the strokes here! Phenomenal! “

Red: “ They don’t deserve it any ways. Black is far too arrogant to talk to us and Orange is a snob.

They talked this every evening, until they decided to do something about it. With Blue who joined them, they decided to call for a meeting. Who should have the maximum space in the canvas? They discussed all day, it wasn’t an easy decision to make. Orange wasn’t willing to leave the space, Green wasn’t happy with it. Red and Black were almost at each others throats. White was all too upset with these changes. Pandemonium broke loose. Someone suggested that they take turns while others thought the canvas should be turned upside down. It was then that a suggestion came to call the artist.

“ Yes! That is it. We need the artist. Where is he?,” asked Yellow.

It wasn’t often that He heard his name being called from a canvas. He could hardly contain his joy. His colours wanted to talk to him. It was a year since He has seen this painting, one of his favourites. It always made him happy. Somehow the colours were not happy today. They didn’t like the fact that they were placed evenly on canvas. Was it possible for him to repaint them all uniformly on the canvas?

So he decided to help them. He got a new canvas and started painting. But something didn’t feel right. Colours after all existed by themselves. He hadn’t painted them. They had painted themselves. He only had to hold the brush and colours talked to him. He heard them that day and painted each stroke as they sang to him. But today, he heard no song, he heard no voice, he heard nothing. Plain silence. He couldn’t paint. He needed that voice in his head, that song in his ears.

Colours didn’t believe him. They never sang the song. They never disturbed him while he painted. Who sang the song? Whose voice was it? Who was it?

p.s. this is the first draft and the first one written in response to a painting shown to us in a creative writing conducted by Mrs Aruna Shenoy in Besant College. Have sent it to her. Will edit it once I get some suggestions. Se happens to be a part time lecturer in Besant , an awesome one I say and am honoured to be her colleague. So this post is for Mrs Aruna Shenoy, my favourite in Besant Womens College. Love you maam :)

Flying high in the sky

2010-04-17T10:25:00.000-07:00

I wish I could fly high up in the sky
high above the clouds
With a flap of my wings
I shall be beyond your reach
far far away, high above in the sky.

If I could fly high up in the sky,
I would compete with the crows,
the eagles, the sparrows and the seagulls,
higher than them all
soaring and flying
far far away,high above in the sky.

If I could fly high up in the sky,
I would go beyond the sky to the heavens
To visit the Gods and Godesses
Envy me, you will. Reach me, you cannot.
For I am
far far away, High above, beyond the skies.

Broken edges

2010-04-15T11:04:00.000-07:00

Life is a jigaw puzzle
I try and make the best
of the pieces here..
Complete the picture, I cannot
Without you.

I try to fit
me and you together..
I have tried many times
and I fail again
This time ending
with broken edges beyond repair!

It is a mad mad world

2010-04-12T10:08:00.000-07:00

It is a mad mad world
searching for a glimpse
of sanity..
Something to keep me from falling apart
Something to keep me going..

Am I the odd one here?
Am I the misfit?
Do I even belong here?

May be they are not mad after all
May be I am not sane after all
May be .....

It is a mad mad world

One of my favourites

2010-04-02T11:00:00.000-07:00

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Brahma

If the red slayer think he slays,
Or if the slain think he is slain,
They know not well the subtle ways
I keep, and pass, and turn again.

Far or forgot to me is near,
Shadow and sunlight are the same,
The vanished gods to me appear,
And one to me are shame and fame.

They reckon ill who leave me out;
When me they fly, I am the wings;
I am the doubter and the doubt,
And I the hymn the Brahmin sings.

The strong gods pine for my abode,
And pine in vain the sacred Seven;
But thou, meek lover of the good!
Find me, and turn thy back on heaven.

1856 [1857]

One of my favourite poems. Its beautiful in itself, so i don't feel the need to write on it ( although I cant say that in class to my students) You are welcome to comment on it.

This is Me!

2010-03-24T09:37:00.000-07:00

Cultured I am not
Well behaved I am not
Ladylike I am definitely not
Well mannered I am not
I do not make sense at times
To some I may seem crazy
I love it that way
At times I am shabby
At times casual
My hair sometimes too untidy
and my bed undone
Don't you dare look
inside my cupboard.
And yes I am clueless
in life, about life
I cannot pretend otherwise
I do get angry
and depressed
I am not perfect
This is me...
a part of me, but still me....
I am much more than this mess
Care to look beyond it?

2010-03-22T10:02:00.000-07:00

Life is indeed very strange..More I think I know it, the less I seem to know about it.

2010-03-15T09:57:00.000-07:00

And the saga begins. Same fights at home, same drama, same excuses, same judgments .Yet I remain untouched today. Mudslinging happens, back biting continues, many more gossiping, much more bitching. Yet they do not touch me now. Things remain the same, they do. I change the way I look at them now :)

Life is after all a game .......

Boredom

2010-03-09T09:41:00.000-08:00

Was just complaining today to Nive about being bored with life. One has such moments in life but somehow we resist it. I have always hated being bored, all of us do. Told Vini about it who said we have the right to feel bored too :) Its interesting more we resist boredom, it persists. So the best thing to do would be, let yourself be bored and enjoy the boredom and once you know you have every right to be bored, then you are no longer bored :)

Jai Gurudev

Game well played!

2010-03-04T09:29:00.000-08:00

Web of lies
woven around
and the vision blurred

what is real
I know not

Lies and truth
truth and lies
all seem same

"Game well played! My friend!"
"Game Well played!"

Now, thats what I call a performance! :D

2010-03-01T08:43:00.000-08:00

Vini has already written an awesome post on the event " anantrang " , Vikram Hazra' s concert in Mangalore. But then I had to make a mention here for I have never seen such an event in mangalore before where 1300 people were dancing crazy to someone's tunes :D... Mangalore has been waiting for this dhamaka since long. To organise an event like this within a span of 2 and half weeks of intense work is definitely not a joke. Music, knowledge and meditation woven together to gift us a an evening of bliss and pure joy :) Looking forward for another great rocking concert with Vikram Hazra eagerly .........

One thing I learnt from him is, not to be ashamed of our product. Dude, if Abida Parveen can make sufi music a brand then why should we shy away from singing bhajans. Moreover sanskrit chants themselves produce such vibrations in our mind that they can energize every cell of the body! Research shows that the Vedic chants and music which had more sound and rhythm, used as a source of healing and up liftment reflected the intuition that each intonation and inflection of voice could have beneficial or adverse effects. (Sumathy Sundar & Sairam, 2005) The Vedic chants were used by the people to please the presiding deities of different Vedic sacrifices to get benedictions of brilliance, power and wisdom to cure diseases.Present day music therapy practice involves use of archika, gathika and samika verses (Vedic verses with single, two and three notes respectively) to enhance focused attention and to improve concentration and to help get into meditative and relaxed states. These recitals called proto raga-s are used in special education settings for children with special needs in the process of mental developments, behavior and personality trait. With these proto-ragas and rapid rhythms, special children respond readily and more quickly than to medium-paced ragas . (Sairam, 2006)
To view the full article click here

and yes also to upgrade yourself, spiritually and technologically. You need both :D

He did share few amazing stories about his courses in Germany, and African jail, truely amazing. You should be there, to feel it :D

10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations.

2010-03-01T08:42:00.000-08:00

1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.. ...why don't you try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good??
Answer:-
No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years....
Stupid Question:-
Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:-
Well you haven't particularly s hr unk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:-
Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:-
No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question:-
Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:-
No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping.... you dumb witted moron.

8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:-
Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:-
No, its autumn and I'm shedding.... ..

9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question:-
Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-
No it wont. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question:-
Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:-
Gosh, it's a miracle .......it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!

p.s. got this as a forward. thought I should share this one :)